My year of "Daring Greatly"......

For those that know me; know I am a man of many interests when it comes to entrepreneurship.  I have followed the path knowing that the greatest business one can have is the one he can create.  It is no surprise that over the past 18 years that I have been a self-made entrepreneur, that I have done my share of research when it comes to "opportunities" and "gaps" in the marketplace.  I can honestly say that I have been tremendously successful 90% of the time in failing forward and 10% of the time experiencing actual success I visioned.

I know that at my core I am most passionate about coaching others.  Heck, I spent years building a brand around it; "The Architect Effect" was finally meaning something.  Now in addition to making my passion into a business; my creative mind has always wandered into how I can leverage what I know. The only road block is that I am not scalable.  How could I coach and support a few others to do the same, and allow that to duplicate throughout a business where everyone were to have the opportunity to the same success that I have had and allow everyone to reap the financial and personal benefits.

The answer is simple.  Network Marketing.  Yes we all know by now that I am enthused by the industry.  It is completely everything I have looked for to compliment my passion for coaching. It is one of the few industries where we all start at the same place regardless of our education, finances, age, etc.  It is without a doubt one of the most difficult things I have ever done, but has also been one of the most rewarding.  I like to think of it as Relationship Marketing and over the years I have formed some amazing relationships by introducing the business to those who were open and those who were not.

I was fortunate to be introduced to the "Apple of Network Marketing" as they are known as in the industry as my first exposure.  To date, out of all of the companies I have been exposed to, coached in, or products I have tried, this one has always taken the cake.  My best friend and I along with a team of supportive leaders helped build one of the most successful organizations in a compressed amount of time hitting the top 5% of its then 900,000 distributors throughout 51 countries, in just under 3 months.

Knowing that I am a businessman that likes to have options, I was always on the lookout for a company to compliment, with the same core values and integrity that I hold near and dear to me.  I looked at literally hundreds and found nothing.  What I did find, and what I did continue to trip over is a company I had never heard of.  A company that was creating a buzz but with no one I knew involved. This "urban myth" company and its growth was such a mystery to me. I stubbornly refused to believe anything it claimed to have or be.  That stopped about a month ago when I received a call from a friend of 10+ years that is just as analytical in his research of these companies as I.  Jonathan Pelletier for the first time ever had my attention.

Jonathan declared what he was doing and where he was going with the company, and for the first time I listened.  He told me what he was going to create in the next 30 days and invited me to come along for the journey.  Well, I hesitated for 28 of those days.  While I was on the sidelines watching as he and his "Limitless Team" were breaking company record after record in the first month, I couldn't help but be a little envious and very curious.  I searched for every reason I could find to say NO and for every reason to say NO, I found 5 reasons to say YES.  So while the window was still open, I slipped in, drank the koolaid and declared it was game on.

Here I am today, letting my sphere of influences know that I intend on shattering Jonathan's records and invite you to take a look at something that I couldn't even grasp my head around.  Show up skeptical, show up excited, show up curious, but just show up.  Tell me I am crazy, tell me NO go *** yourself, tell me you're along for the ride, tell me nows not the time, tell me you see the vision.  Whatever you choose to tell me, I want to hear it from you direct.

After all "Some Will - Some Won't - So What"!  This magnitude of commitment, dedication, sacrifice and belief for the extraordinary and unprecedented records that will manifest over the next few months is not for everyone.  In fact we need you to say "NO" - as the faster we get to a "NO" is the faster we get to a "YES".

Generational Differences among Small Businesses Owners

As the youngest Baby Boomers turn 50, Gen-Xers mature into middle age and Millennials charge into the working world, the small business community is feeling a shift in the way business is done. Among these generations, there are notable differences in attitude, management style and skillsets. But how do these variances affect the way entrepreneurs run their business and influence the economy?

Millennials are the most optimistic about their business’s revenue and the economy

It likely comes as no surprise that the youngest generation, Millennial SBOs, have the greatest optimism about the economy. More than three-quarters predict their revenue will increase over the next 12 months and 82 percent believe their local economy will improve. Boomers expressed the least optimism, with 52 percent feeling positive about their companies’ revenue growth and 41 percent feeling optimistic about the local economy. Greater optimism from the younger generation may be the result of less exposure to cycles of economic downturn and fluctuations.

All generations see themselves as “tech savvy,” but the importance of tech varies

When grading themselves on tech-savviness, the Millennial generation leads the pack with 85 percent of young SBOs giving themselves an “A” or “B.” Gen-Xers followed closely behind at 74 percent, and Boomers trailed with 58 percent giving themselves high marks. When asked how long SBOs could run their business without a smartphone or tablet, we found a big variance in response. Fifty-nine percent of Boomers said they could run their business indefinitely without a smartphone or tablet. Only 22 percent of Millennials could conceive of this, as well as 39 percent of Gen-Xers. In addition, nearly half of Millennials and Gen-Xers said it would be impossible to run their business without a smartphone or tablet for more than a day.

Millennial SBOs self-identify as creative and confident versus their dedicated and hard-working generational counterparts

While Millennial SBOs describe themselves as creative and confident, Gen Xers and Boomers see themselves as hardworking and dedicated. The differences in generational self-perception may not only affect the way small businesses are run, it could also influence the types of businesses opened in the future. 

Generations share some things in common

While SBOs may describe themselves differently, all tend to value a company culture that is focused on the customer. Gen Xers, Baby Boomers and Millennials consistently emphasized the importance of a client-centric approach to business.

Despite the many ways SBOs approach their businesses, each plays an important role in the well-being of the small business community and the economy. As we’ve seen in our survey, new technology is helping small business owners run their companies more efficiently, maintain more control over their business and offer more complex products to customers. This creates more opportunities for small business owners to be successful, regardless of their generation.

Empathy vs. Sympathy: What’s The Difference? Know when to use them!

Dictionary Definitions of Empathy vs. Sympathy

Part of what makes it so hard to tell the difference between empathy and sympathy is the fact that both words sound very similar and both concepts espouse similar things in practice.

Empathy: the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner; also :  the capacity for this

Sympathy: (1) the feeling that you care about and are sorry about someone else’s trouble, grief, misfortune, etc. : a sympathetic feeling. (2)an affinity, association, or relationship between persons or things wherein whatever affects one similarly affects the other.

As you can see, the two are very similar. Certainly, we begin to see a picture emerge. Conventional wisdom holds that where empathy is the feeling of “walking in another’s shoes,” sympathy is more of a feeling of being sorry or bereft, even on behalf of another person. 

The Emotional Difference Between Empathy and Sympathy

When we use sympathy as an emotional tool, we understand that it gives us insight into another’s situation and emotional state of mind. It can be useful, for instance, on a deeper level to develop a firm grasp of empathetic understanding of another person in order to develop the social skills that we need to maintain relationships across all facets of our lives, including romantic relationships and in dating situations.

On the other hand, without attempting to attribute too much of an ulterior motive to (or cheapen the concept of) empathy, a savvy business person or experienced customer service representative can use their developed empathetic proclivities to better serve consumers or customers.  It can also reduce friction between people of different personality types and allow people from all backgrounds to relate to one another by imagining themselves in the other person’s position. Once you take a moment to imagine a person’s background, culture, experiences, and personality, it becomes easier to deal with conflict in certain situations because you are more likely to give a person the same consideration and understanding that you would like in return.

In short, from an emotional standpoint, empathy is very closely related to that golden rule; “treat others as you would like to be treated”. In this instance, you would reverse the statement once you have allowed yourself to empathize with another person and consider how it is that they would like to be treated.

Sympathy serves two major purposes from an emotional standpoint. As we discussed, sympathy is most often referred to in situations where a loss has occurred or when another person is seeking to offer condolences or commiseration in a time of grief, whether brief or prolonged. For instance, you may wish to offer your sympathy to a person who is going through a period of depression. When you sympathize with them, you are admitting that you, in fact, do not know how they feel, but wish to offer your support. This allows you to offer your support without diminishing the person’s own state of mind.

We can also use the word “sympathy” to signal our commiseration with another’s beliefs, mores, or values. This usage is quite different from what we understand the traditional meaning to be. For instance, you’ve probably heard the term, “I am sympathetic to your cause”. This phrase is often used to signal your agreement or cohesion with another person’s ideals, tastes, or preferences. Let’s see what this looks like in practice.

Let us imagine that you are speaking to a friend, and in your conversation you discover that neither you nor your friend are particularly fond of cats. You might even say that both of you absolutely hate cats. In this instance, it can be said that you are sympathetic to your friend’s preference. On the other hand, your preferences, motivations, or values do not need to be identical in order to be considered “sympathetic”. Let’s clarify that. Suppose that in this situation, your friend hates cats, and you love them. However, let us imagine that you do hate aardvarks (just bear with us for a moment!). As long as your distaste for aardvarks is the same as your friend’s distaste for cats, when they tell you, “I dislike cats!” you are perfectly accurate in saying, “boy, I can sympathize with that!”

Empathy vs. Sympathy: 3 Examples in Common Situations

Finally, let us take a look at some common examples of empathy vs. sympathy just to summarize and ensure that we have a complete grasp on what makes the difference between sympathy and empathy.

Situation #1: A friend of yours has had to put her companion, a 15-year-old border collie down due to the dog’s illness. She is understandably heartbroken.

Empathy: In this scenario, if you have never had to experience this kind of loss, you would attempt to imagine the experience from your friend’s point of view. You might consider that she is not only sad about the loss of her dog, but also reflecting with happiness on her happy memories with Fido.

Sympathy: If you have had a similar experience, you may wish to offer your condolences without detracting from or overshadowing your friend’s grief.

Situation #2: You are a fourth grade teacher. You have a new student starting in your class today and the child is visibly frightened.

Empathy: Attempt to imagine what it is like to be a pre-adolescent in a new place. You may not be able to replicate the feeling exactly, but surely you can imagine feeling the way the child does.

Sympathy: Remember what it is like, even as an adult, to be a stranger in a strange place.

Situation #3: You are driving along when someone rear ends your car. The two of you pull over to the side of the road and prepare to exchange insurance information.

Empathy:  Though the situation is not your fault, you might wish to think about how you would like to be treated if it were. Certainly, you’d already be feeling bad, and being berated by a stranger would be unproductive.

Sympathy: We’ve all been at fault for an accident (vehicular or not) at some point. Try and channel that emotion and act accordingly.

If you're considering coaching, here are 12 ways you might benefit

When I building my first company, I realized that the biggest limitation to my company's growth was my own growth as the founder & ceo. So I hired a coach. In a matter of months, my then-coach guided me to put in place a strategic growth plan, bring to life company values, work through stressful interpersonal situations, and be a lot more decisive and concrete in my style. It was invaluable.

If you're considering coaching, here are 12 ways you might benefit:

1. Hard results - greater productivity, faster promotions, bigger profits
2. Deeper learnings - about yourself, how you're perceived, where you can improve
3. Faster action - advancing things faster and with greater precision
4. Space to hear your own voice - to talk something through and gain perspective
5. Awareness of perspectives, beliefs, and attitudes that may be holding you back
6. Support and confidence to "lean in" and make bold moves
7. Clarity on your values and what you stand for, which leads to greater conviction
8. Ideas for ways to improve that you may not see - awareness of blind spots
9. Emotional support, empathy, and encouragement - feels less lonely
10. The cold truth others won't tell you
11. Third-party moderation for 360-reviews, strategic planning, and conflict resolution
12. Support for improving specific skills - communication, delegation, conflict management, team building, persuasion, etc.
    

In my eyes, these are incredible leverage points for growth. But don't get me wrong, coaching isn't a panacea. It won't work for someone who doesn't have a desire to learn and grow. In some situations, consulting or therapy may be more appropriate (see chart below). And let's face it: not all coaches will fit. There's an element of chemistry that needs to be right.