Integrity and Personal Responsibility = CORE VALUES

Integrity

The dictionary defines integrity as:

1. “firm adherence to a code of values”
2. “the quality or state of being complete or undivided”

Integrity is:

1. Being true to our values and ourselves
2. Keeping our commitments – to others AND to ourselves

Why does it matter?

• Integrity is a “core value”
• When we’re “complete” or undivided, we can accomplish great things
• Integrity gives us POWER!

What happens when we fail to keep a commitment?

• We get “out of integrity” when we fail to keep a commitment
• Without integrity, we are incomplete, or divided
• Without integrity, it isn’t possible for us to act powerfully in a situation

How can we restore integrity?

• By acknowledging that we failed to keep a commitment (no excuses are necessary – or helpful)
• By “completing” our commitment – either recommitting (in as specific a form as possible) – or altering the commitment

Why bother restoring integrity?

• It give you the ability to deal with the specific situation powerfully
• It gives you the ability to act powerfully in all other areas of your life

What does this have to do with teams?

• Essentially, our greatest tools in life are our commitment and our word
• Integrity is based on selecting our commitments and then keeping our word
• And integrity requires being honest - first with ourselves, and then with others – about our commitments, and about the commitments others make to us

Personal Responsibility

The dictionary defines responsibility as:

1. “moral, legal, or mental accountability”
2. “being the cause, motive, or agent”

Personal Responsibility is:

• Taking on accountability for our personal situation – for our life
• Declaring that we are responsible for what we do, what we have, who we are, and for all the conversations we have and situations we are in
• This definition does not have to be "true” to be useful – think of it simply as a commitment
• Personal responsibility is a commitment  we make to ourselves, to being an agent in the world - the cause of who we are and what we have

Why does it matter?

• If we are responsible for what happens to us, then there doesn’t need to be blame or guilt – to be aimed at others or at ourselves
• There is only what happens in the world and what we create in the world
• Whatever we’ve generated so far, be OK with it. It’s already happened.
• If you’re not satisfied with it, then generate something else!

What happens when we fail to take personal responsibility?

• We often blame others or blame circumstances for our situation
• We tell stories explaining why we didn’t produce the result we wanted
• Friends will usually listen sympathetically and let us avoid personal responsibility
• And we can convince ourselves that it wasn’t in our control

But some things really aren’t under our control . . .

• But saying THAT is a trap – as soon as we put responsibility somewhere else, we are saying that we were powerless to affect the situation
• If we take responsibility - even when we believe there were other factors at work – we are acting as though we have the power to determine events
• Always act as though you have the power to determine events!

But we aren’t really 100% in control of events, so why pretend?

• Why pretend that someone or something else is in control?
• Either way we’re “making up” an explanation - neither is really “true”
• But taking on that we’re in control of our lives is more empowering
• It allows us to deal powerfully with any situation we are in – no matter what role other people or events played in bringing us to that situation

What does this have to do with teams?

There are several key things you can do to help your teammates - and your team.

• Take on that you are 100% responsible for how your team performs. (It isn’t necessarily true, but if everyone on your team takes that attitude there will be no blame and you’ll accomplish much more as a team)
• Be open, honest, and supportive of each of your teammates. If you find yourself thinking that one (or more) of your teammates are deficient in some way - give that up! Expect great things of them and then keep giving them chances to rise to the occasion.
• Volunteer for team assignments. Don’t sit back and wait for someone else to do it.
• Offer - multiple times - to assist another teammate with his or her work.
• Make requests of others on the team. Ask for help. Consider that keeping to yourself - hiding out - is a way of being stingy with your team. Give your teammates an opportunity to contribute!
• Design at least one way to make a task fun!

Combining Integrity & Personal Responsibility

• One Barrier to “Team:”  a reluctance to “call someone” on failure to get the team work done
• I’m asking you to step up and take action
• I am requesting that you hold your team members accountable – remember, that’s simply treating them with respect
• It’s not the end of the world when a colleague doesn’t make a deliverable. Or when a team member slips a team deadline
• But ignoring it is not being authentic, and there’s not much integrity in that
• This isn’t about BLAME
• Since every one on a team is responsible for achieving team goals, there can be no finger pointing. If a job isn’t getting done YOU have a responsibility to take action of some sort
• But if someone promised to do something and didn’t do it, you should let them know that their approach does not work for the team. This is not about someone being right or wrong, good or bad. It’s about whether we’ve produced the result we said we would.
• And it’s not about apology. Often, the first thing we do is apologize when we’ve missed a commitment. Don’t (just) apologize – the most important thing is to declare what you’re committed to. So re-commit to do whatever you didn’t do (by a specific date and time), or else let your teammates know that you aren’t going to do it!

Consider that if you leave something unsaid . . . not taking action is an expression of SOMETHING:

• I don’t buy into the team goals (I don’t commit to the request)
• I won’t expect others to commit (and I won’t ask them admit they’re not committed)
• I won’t hold others to their commitments (I don’t want to be _____ )
• You can’t make me do this team stuff
• I’m too cool to be a team member (looking good - can’t touch that!)
• I’m too _____ (insert your favorite personal inadequacy - the story you have created about yourself to help you avoid taking action in different areas of your life)

Remember, all of the above is just one interpretation, or one approach to teams and personal relationships. It’s isn’t necessarily “true.” But it isn’t necessarily false, either! Enjoy.